What have I wrought?

Anyone out there a second guess type person? Is that really a “type”of personality? Type SG Personality? I am afraid that second-guessing myself and my decisions is something that permeates my very existence on a daily, if not hourly, basis. At 17 I enlisted in the Navy, and then thoroughly questioned that decision when I was first categorized as a “magot” by my Company Commander, upon my arrival at bootcamp. Around my 19th birthday, Iraq invaded Kuwait, and on that day I came before my Commanding Officer, demanding (respectfully of course) to be on the first boat crew that was deployed to the Gulf. A month later, while “hanging out” off the coast of Iraq, I began to question that piece of brilliant decision making. Even at the tender, innocent age of 4, having my kindergarten class picture taken, while sporting the ever popular plaid turtle neck and hand-me-down Toughskins, I began to question my sense of style. Where am I going with this, you ask? (Although I am pretty sure that you, my brilliant and astute readers, already know where this is headed.) I find myself periodically looking out over the farm, seriously questioning my current mental state. Some days I have all I can handle with work, commuting, and the odds and ends that seem to gobble up my time at an alarming rate. Honestly, it is a stretch to call this place a farm at this point. It is 3 acres, zoned “Ag”<insert random hand gesture> (Street-cred again! Hollar!), with a house and garage. That’s it. Well, that is not entirely true … this little slice of heaven came with extremely generous portions of both Grasshoppers and Genetically-Engineered House Flies. What in the world am I doing here??

When I reach the point of dousing myself with a combustable liquid and look for an open flame (think human torch) I come full circle. We want to transform this blank canvas … restoring the fauna and flora, raising chickens for organic eggs, goats for environmentally friendly soap and delicious cheeses, and vegetables, brambles, and fruit trees that are toxin free (as much as possible). While a nobel pursuit,  it is not enough. While becoming self-sufficient is certainly appealing, I need more purpose, the kind of purpose that isn’t quite so “self-centric”. It is at these times that I remember our real goal … feeding and aiding those in need. Providing healthy, organic food to those who may otherwise not have access to that type of sustenance.  I endeavor to keep that foremost in my thoughts while tacking this part of my life.

Old as Dirt …

If you read Deena’s latest blog, then you know that I am not a huge fan of birthdays, well, to be more specific, my birthday. And it’s not because I am in denial about aging, although that level of ignorant bliss does have its appeal! However, I did get the best email this week titled “Relief for Senior house owners”. Really? Are there little evil minions out there that monitor birthdays, so they can start spamming you with “Senior-based” email and snail mail, once you hit that certain, special age? There is definitely something about hitting a particular age, when it becomes a convenient scape goat. That sore back from slouching on the couch too long watching TV suddenly becomes “Man I am gettin old!” The sniffles that come with common allergies become an urgent trip to a specialist and reviewing your last will and testament  My favorite is masking my nightly ice cream ritual by stating “I need the extra ‘calcium’ in these advanced years”. (Note: If that isn’t plausible to who I am talking to, I quickly switch to the old stand-by, “I am not quite sure how much time I have left.”) I am sure this is where I am supposed to have yet another life changing epiphany, where I share something inspiring with you, and you go forth with that little nugget to do great and amazing things. However, this old boy is just too dog-on tired, and needs to wrap this up so I catch Hee Haw, work on my bunions and turn in before 8.  🙂

The Sharks Thing …

Honestly, I just tossed that little ditty into the title on a whim. It is Friday night after all and I needed a snazzy title to convince you to blow 10 minutes of your life that you will never get back. (That’s asking a lot, come to think of it. Now I have shame … dang.) On another note, I hope to survey the property this weekend and get an accurate drawing put together and posted. I also hope to get a building plan and blue prints for the chicken coop published for your reading pleasure. No need to thank me.

Have a great weekend!!

K&D